Men – Get A Clue!!

Why are men so selfish? Most MEN would LOVE a THREESOME. You, sandwiched by your wife and some random rolled off the red carpet hottie. That sounds quite divine!

ThreesomeBut what if your woman wants to indulge in such a delicacy too. Sandwiched by Troy superstar and heartthrob Brad Pitt and the hunk with no junk badboy Hugh Jackman. What would you say then? Brad Pitt

Hugh Jackman

Excluding the few men that wouldn’t have a problem, the others would suffer from Schlong-O-Phobia (the fear of all schlongs but your own) or some would complain of having a severe Allergic Reaction (the thought or sight of other schlongs except one’s own, causes rashes). What’s up with that?

And guys, what’s up with the ONE-SIDED CHEATING EXPERIMENTING? If you want to cheat experiment, why not have a talk with your person and come to some form of arrangement. You guys can have each other during the week and you cheat experiment (I can’t seem to get that right) on weekends and/or public holidays, or whatever works for you. Tiger Woods

 

Tiger Woods didn’t make any arrangement with his wife and look how well that worked out.

 

Why do you guys have to be all secretive about it? Is it because most men are insecure? Are you guys fearful that if there is in fact some agreement, your woman might actually grow fond of the third party’s schlong over your own?

 

And another thing. What’s up with getting your schlong sucked and not returning the favor??? Do you think that schlong choking was a mandatory requirement when you guys hooked up? I wonder what that second date was like:

Guy: After deep thought I’ve come to the realization that this relation is NOt HEADing in the right place.

Girl: What?! Are you breaking up with me?

Guy: Yes. It’s definitely not me. It’s YOU. My expectations were clearly too high 😦

Girl: What expectation??

Guy: You don’t suck, and I just can’t have that. I’m sorry.

Girl: (splashes water in guy’s face) Storms off shouting DICK!!

Guys, if your woman decides on trying out your flavor popsicle, then you’re OBLIGATED to try hers!! (tootsie roll, that is). She likes it too!!! HELLOOOO!!! OrgasmCan I get a HAL-LEU-ER please!? She probably don’t bitch about it as much as you do (out loud that is), but  chances are she’ll enjoy it even more than you do.

N.B. Whenever your woman is trying your popsicle and you feel teeth (ouch!!), thats the time she’s cussing you in her head and got distracted. “Selfish fucker!! Oops! Sorry honey!”

To conclude, Men …

… the selfish thing is SO last year!