GREAT Christmas Gift Ideas

If like me, you’re puzzled on what to get a loved one for Christmas, then look no further. I have compiled a list of Christmas items that are guaranteed to make your loved one verklempt!!

Items courtesy of Uncommon Goods

For Her

Bullet Casing Bracelet

If you’re a gun enthusiast and you collect your bullet casings (for whatever strange reason – maybe you have bullet-o-phobia: the fear of losing your bullet casing and letting them fall into the wrong hands) and you’ve always wondered what you’re going to do with them. Then construct a Bullet Casing Bracelet for your lover. That way it will be in (or ON, rather) good hands and close to home.

Bouquet Glove

Are you a hopeless romantic but you’re tired of the traditional roses that die over time. Then get her a Bouquet Glove. Every time she wears your glove, she’ll see those roses and a frown smile will light her face as she thinks about killing kissing you.

Sweater Skirt

If your woman is annoyed at the sweaters her mother send her every Holiday, then do her a favour. Rip up those hideous beautifully knitted sweaters and combine them all to make a beautiful skirt for her. She’ll appreciate it more coming from you because face it, Christmas is NOT about  complaining about crappy gifts you receive. It’s the thought that counts, right? 

Scrabble Jewellery

If you’re like me and you have a lot of trash treasure in your basement (like pieces of scrabble letters), then put those shit treasures to good use. You heard her hint time and time again that she needs a necklace. Scrabble Jewellery would be a pleasant surprise. Trust me 😉

Goggles Umbrella

I can’t tell you how much I hate not being able to see where I’m going during a heavy downpour! Nothing ticks me off more! Thank God for the genius that thought of the Goggles Umbrella!

Chocolate Stick

Is she hopelessly addicted to chocolate and its beginning to show around the mid section? As a concerned man, you want to tell her that she should loose weight, but you’re afraid to (you’re probably right). Get her the Chocolate Stick instead. It has the same scent with a lot less calories (it’s a safer alternative too).

For Him

Bacon Lube

Does your man love bacon more than you? Get him to share the love this Christmas with a tube of Bacon Lube. That way, he’ll be with both of his loves. What more could a man ask for? Let’s hope he doesn’t take the lube, kiss you on the forehead and go lock himself up in the bathroom 😦

Wooden Tie

He has a vast tie collection. Partly because he only requested ties for the Christmas. The stores are running out of ties to sell you. Put that hand saw in the garage that he never uses to some good use. For a more personal touch, you can carve his initials into his Wooden Tie, that way no one would dare try and steal it!

Toothpaste Wringer

Think he’s a cheap bastard frugal person, then maybe he’ll get the point if you get him the Toothpaste Wringer, or maybe your plans could backfire and he thinks the world of you for getting him a gift that facilitates his cheap bastardly economical way of life.

Perched Parrot

Do you think he talks incessantly? Does he opt to fix everything (or tries to) that is broken (or not). Then the perfect gift for him would be the Perched Parrot.

And last but certainly not least. For those people that has everything in the world, you can get them the one thing that they weren’t expecting – The Gift of Nothing. It’s only £4.

Gift of Nothing

So that’s it folks. I really hope it’s not too late to go and get something from the list for your loved one. To see them boil with rage that sparkle in their eye on Christmas Morning when they open their gift would be worth the trouble you took. With that said, I bid thee all a Merry Christmas!

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13 thoughts on “GREAT Christmas Gift Ideas

  1. Oh my goodness, I so hope to be the lucky recipient of the Goggles Umbrella – for real here in the desert I need one. And in all seriousness,(YES seriousness – I mean it) call me weird….but I like the Scrabble Necklace, Yeah that’s pretty cool and it would be neat if you could get it with as many tiles as you want – to make a name, how many points is lizzie? or to spell a word. Like VERKLEMPT. I feel like a puddle of silliness omg.!! I tell you (it’s true) I looked up the damn word every way I could think of dammit and could not find it. Can you believe that shit? I feel like I have tp on my shoe – and nobody will tell me. Well not anymore. But I am feeling a bit sheepish, a humble lizzie which may not be too bad really. Great gift ideas. Wish my bf was still around – I would have to…and when I say have to i am being slightly low key – get the Bacon Lube. If I had known about it last week I would have sent it to him. It is fitting in so many ways you don’t even know Ol JimBob (was that his name) would be having the time of his life greasin up …..and ok then sorry I went off on a tangent. Great Ideas – i said that. Thanks for the super lists. The gift of nothing – priceless.
    🙂 Peace. And goodwill and joy and laughter (what the hell it’s Christmas) on earth. 🙂

    • The goggles umbrella is a classic Lizzie. To tell the truth, when I saw you use the word verklempt for the first time, I was like wow, that’s an interesting word. So I put my google-ing skills to some good use and low and behold it exists (for the record, I NEVER doubted you for a second ;)) Yeah JimBo was his name. He would have a happy christmas!!

  2. Sadly, every one of thee gifts will make the designer a fortune. Of real money.

    No? Pet rock anyone? Yeah, that’s what I thought.
    Sigh, and I’ll keep this list handy for next Christmas.

    • That is so true! I am going to come up with something before next year….something sooooo ridiculous everyone will HAVE to have one (or more) and I will make my fortune AND have my 15 minutes of fame (and laugh gleefully) all at once. And I will share with my friends cause that’s what I always say – share the wealth….I had a pet rock…a couple actually – have they made a comeback yet? Maybe they are due – wadda ya say ? – we could start painting today – ok maybe tomorrow – and by next year we could be – the proud owners of a lot of pet rocks – or have a little bit of moolah – what do those things eat anyways?

      • I was the proud owner of a pet rock. Unfortunately, I gave then away on Christmas Eve to a lovely family. I could not maintain his dirt consumption lifestyle. I was heartbroken 😦

  3. Pingback: The Community Meme | Amor's Thoughts

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