Sex — The Greatest Act Man Could Engage In

Sex is great. It’s one of the greatest acts that man could engage in. Is sex wrong? A very loaded question.

Believers vs Non-believers
For a non-believer, of course not! How can something that’s so natural ever be “wrong”? I can empathize, truly I can. But for a christian, it’s not right. Why? Why should non-believers have all that fun…

The Book of Guidelines
…Because Christians are given a book which outlines how s/he should live his/her life as best as possible — granted as a christian you will falter along the way because we’re still human — if you want to inherit the Kingdom of Heaven — a Christian’s ultimate goal.

1 Thessalonian chapter 4 tells us [Christians] that our sanctification is the will of God and that we should abstain from sexual immorality because the Lord called us [Christians] not for sexual immorality, but for holiness and honor and if we disregard this, we disregard not man but God who gave his spirit onto us.

Conclusion
I believe that some Christians are too judgmental and hypocritical. The same can be said for non-believers. When one Christians condemns something, you guys [non-Christians] cast a huge net on all Christians and condemn everything we say or do.

We all were blessed with the gift of life, and we all have to live it as we see fit. Christians live their lives according to the will of God, and non-Christians live their lives as they see fit. However, it is written in the Book of Guidelines that a Christian should always try and help out his brother, that’s why some Christians tend to “preach” to non-Christians.

Everyone is different. We won’t necessarily share the same thoughts on topical issues. When we ALL (Christians and non-Christians alike) begin to truly accept that, and start focusing on the bigger issues, as Jefferson said; the world will truly be a better place.

 

 

Artist Alert: Jane Birkin & Serge Gainsbourg

French is truly the language of love. I am immersing myself into this beautiful language. I’ve changed the language on my browser to French and I listen to French news. I also found some French bloggers out there in blog-sphere: One French Word, French A L.A Cart & Ici on Parle Francais (We Speak French).

(Note to self: Add visit France to bucket list).

I found this song Je T’aime … Moi Non Plus on Guylaine’s music blog GCG Creative Enterprise. The song is a dialogue between two lover during sex.

Jane Birkin & Serge Gainsbourg – Je T’aime … Moi Non Plus

Lyrics:

French

Je t’aime… Moi non plus

(refrain)
Je t’aime, je t’aime
Oh oui je t’aime !

Moi non plus
Oh mon amour

Comme la vague irrésolue

Je vais, je vais et je viens
Entre tes reins
Je vais et je viens
Entre tes reins
Et je me retiens

(refrain)

Tu es la vague, moi l’île nue

Tu vas, tu vas et tu viens
Entre mes reins
Tu vas et tu viens
Entre mes reins
Et je te rejoins

(refrain)

Comme la vague irrésolue

Je vais, je vais et je viens
Entre tes reins
Je vais et je viens
Entre tes reins
Et je me retiens

Tu vas, tu vas et tu viens
Entre mes reins
Tu vas et tu viens
Entre mes reins
Et je te rejoins

(refrain)

L’amour physique est sans issue

Je vais, je vais et je viens
Entre tes reins
Je vais et je viens
Et je me retiens
Non ! Maintenant viens !

English

Je t’aime… Mon non plus

I love you, I love you
Oh, yes I love you!
No longer me
Oh, my love…
Like the undecided wave
I go, I go and I come
Between your back
I go and I come
Between your back
And I hold back.

I love you, I love you
Oh, yes I love you!
no longer me
Oh, my love…
You are the wave, I’m the naked island
You go, you go and you come
Between my back
You go and you come
Between my back
And I rejoin you.

I love you, I love you
Oh, yes I love you!
no longer me
Oh, my love…
Like the undecided wave
I go, I go and I come
Between your back
I go and I come
Between your back
And I hold back.

You go, you go and you come
Between my back
You go and you come
Between my back
And I rejoin you.

I love you, I love you
Oh, yes I love you!
No longer me
Oh, my love…
The physical love is without a way out
I go, I go and I come
Between your back
I go and I come back
And I hold back
No! Now come!

Men – Get A Clue!!

Why are men so selfish? Most MEN would LOVE a THREESOME. You, sandwiched by your wife and some random rolled off the red carpet hottie. That sounds quite divine!

ThreesomeBut what if your woman wants to indulge in such a delicacy too. Sandwiched by Troy superstar and heartthrob Brad Pitt and the hunk with no junk badboy Hugh Jackman. What would you say then? Brad Pitt

Hugh Jackman

Excluding the few men that wouldn’t have a problem, the others would suffer from Schlong-O-Phobia (the fear of all schlongs but your own) or some would complain of having a severe Allergic Reaction (the thought or sight of other schlongs except one’s own, causes rashes). What’s up with that?

And guys, what’s up with the ONE-SIDED CHEATING EXPERIMENTING? If you want to cheat experiment, why not have a talk with your person and come to some form of arrangement. You guys can have each other during the week and you cheat experiment (I can’t seem to get that right) on weekends and/or public holidays, or whatever works for you. Tiger Woods

 

Tiger Woods didn’t make any arrangement with his wife and look how well that worked out.

 

Why do you guys have to be all secretive about it? Is it because most men are insecure? Are you guys fearful that if there is in fact some agreement, your woman might actually grow fond of the third party’s schlong over your own?

 

And another thing. What’s up with getting your schlong sucked and not returning the favor??? Do you think that schlong choking was a mandatory requirement when you guys hooked up? I wonder what that second date was like:

Guy: After deep thought I’ve come to the realization that this relation is NOt HEADing in the right place.

Girl: What?! Are you breaking up with me?

Guy: Yes. It’s definitely not me. It’s YOU. My expectations were clearly too high :(

Girl: What expectation??

Guy: You don’t suck, and I just can’t have that. I’m sorry.

Girl: (splashes water in guy’s face) Storms off shouting DICK!!

Guys, if your woman decides on trying out your flavor popsicle, then you’re OBLIGATED to try hers!! (tootsie roll, that is). She likes it too!!! HELLOOOO!!! OrgasmCan I get a HAL-LEU-ER please!? She probably don’t bitch about it as much as you do (out loud that is), but  chances are she’ll enjoy it even more than you do.

N.B. Whenever your woman is trying your popsicle and you feel teeth (ouch!!), thats the time she’s cussing you in her head and got distracted. “Selfish fucker!! Oops! Sorry honey!”

To conclude, Men …

… the selfish thing is SO last year!

 

Unfaithful – Confessions of a Cheater

What is it about cheating that makes us all fall into its trap? Is it the thrill of the newness? The attention we get from the third party (the cheater in crime)? The plethora of What Ifs that we ask ourselves?

Curiosity. We are enthralled by it.

We justify cheating by saying “Our partner has gotten boring” or “He/She doesn’t excite me anymore“. Were we made to be polygamous?

I can speak from experience, and believe me when I tell you that cheating is hard work. Instead of asking those What Ifs, and thinking how great it will be after you have satisfied your curiosity (no such thing by the way. once you start, you’ll be hooked like a junkie), think about the person you are in a relationship with. Think about why you’re with them (you must have been attracted to them for some reason), then think of the risks that you will be taking if you indulge.

My main reason for cheating was the ego boost and secondly I was searching for “The One“. Just knowing that I could get a particular woman gave me great joy. My longest relationship was SIX MONTHS :( But even after many va-jajays, I still had a longing for something more. And I’m quite proud to say that after years of searching…

(drum rolls please)

I FINALLY found her. She completes me (sounds cliche right?). I cannot imagine my world without her in it (wow, this is just riddled with cliches). And when I hear the occasional What Ifs being asked, I draw for my 12-Gage and blast that fucker away :) When she’s in pain, I’m in pain. So why would I intentionally put her through something like that? Sadistic little fucker. Oh, and she knows about my playboy ways (sweet right :))?

(This post is getting longer by the minute)

So, to all you would-be cheaters, it’s not worth it. You might be thinking “what’s the worse that could happen?”. Well aside from REALLY hurting the person you love, she could draw for her 12-Gage and blow your head off (small or big would be her choice). Ladies, the man could kill you and the innocent person you cheated with. FOOD FOR THOUGHT :)

She Screwed Me Well

I needed to get off the base because colonel was pissing me off about messing up the parade earlier.

I went to the nearest bar to clear my head. I went to my favorite spot.

The spot where my back was squared against the wall giving me a perfect view of the entire bar.

Some would say I’m paranoid, but I think it’s my military training and the time I spent in Iraq.

I was on my third Cuban and fifth glass of scotch and ready to leave when I saw her, or rather her legs. Long, sexy and toned.

My eyes crept slowly up from her red Christian Louboutin pumps and paused right below her ass where her black laced mini dress stopped.

Christian Louboutin Pumps

Her pose captured the attention of all the men in the bar. She sat seductively and invitingly on the bar stool. She looked around and then ordered a dirty martini. Within minutes, three vultures surrounded her and were picking away at her. She looked uninterested and annoyed.

I signaled Bruce, the bartender, to give the mysterious woman a Flirtini. I waved to her when Bruce pointed to me. Ten minutes later I went over. With one hand placed gently on her hip, I whispered in her ear “I’m here to rescue you from these losers”.

She smiled and I led her to my corner.

Hours rolled by in seconds. We talked and laughed like two seasoned lovers. I could tell that she was drunk and horny and I was approaching my quota. She kept rubbing her leg up and down my calf as she licked up the juice that dripped down her fingers from the pineapple, each time inching closer and closer to my dirty banana. Flirtini

I told her it’s time to go.

She asked, my place our yours?

I said mine.

On our way to my place, she took off her panties and threw it in my lap. I almost crashed.

We barely got through the front when her hand was down my pants and her tongue down my throat.

I pinned her to the front door and slipped my middle finger into her very fertile land.

Her mounds stared firmly at me. She massaged the dirty banana with her tongue for 10mins then she led it by its head into the fertile land of wonders.

I explored the depths of the oasis for about an hour or two. On the leather sofa, the staircase, against the bookshelf, the kitchen counter and ended in the bedroom. We I was exhausted. I fell asleep on the bedroom floor.

The following morning, I woke to find her gone. That was expected, but what I didn’t expect to see was an empty space where my 72inch plasma once hung, replaced by a note saying:

PLASMA WAS HERE!

XOXO